Sunday, August 12, 2007

Just one of the guys

Here I am in Jackson Hole, Wyoming hanging out with the fellas hours before Chris’s wedding. It was one of my favorite parts of the trip. We had lunch near Cache Creek, went to the classic car show and shot a round of pool before getting Chris to the (figurative) church on time. I’ve known Chris forever and John's been an honorary part of our college crew for as long as I’ve known Chris, but I had just met Gary and Craig a couple of days earlier. No matter, I had a great time with these guys, which is just what I needed. There’s nothing like a day out with the boys to make a girl forget her troubles. The trip as a whole was great, the wedding was really beautiful and I got to spend some quality time with my two best friends, which means the world to me. But under my current circumstances, I have to admit that I was really struggling to keep it together from day to day. I just felt out of sorts and out of place a lot of the time, which is why being included in the boys’ day out meant so much to me.

Aside from obvious reasons, I really love being around my guy friends. I love their occasional disregard for ironing, their willingness to try to fix anything whether they know how to or not (I like to call this the MacGyver factor), and their general goofiness, especially when they’re trying to be cool. I love that they can go from asshole to teddy bear in about 25 seconds when necessary. And I love the lack of filter which can result in anything from uncomfortable laughter to absolute shock. Most of the men in my life don’t really have a filter, so as long as I brace myself for an honest answer, I can ask anything I want. (Sidebar: Please don’t think that I am one of those women who have nary a close girlfriend. How can you not have even one other woman to share the girly bits of life with when necessary? I have known women like that and frankly, it creeps me out.) While there’s nothing quite like getting the phone call when you've been crying into your haagen-daaz for days from your girlfirends saying “F**K GUYS! Let’s go dance!” I do have my moments when I need to be around the boys, if only to get a fresh perspective on life. My old roommate was this big, tough, barrel chested guy who worked in theater (he could build anything, seriously) and he always had all these guys coming over to the house to drink and play video games and shoot the shit for hours. Sometimes I would go upstairs and hang out with them. The best part was when they would forget that there was a girl in the room, because give a man enough to drink and he will say anything. I learned a lot about men from hanging out with those guys and I miss them.

There’s a widespread theory that men and women can never be friends because the sex thing always gets in the way. That may be true; I have some experience with that myself. I’ve been hurt by many a boy, but I still love them all. Right now, I’m at a place in my life where I don’t want to have that extra added nonsense. I just want to have a beer, watch the game and learn some new swear words…is that too much to ask?

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